This past August I took a month off of work to bond with my newborn daughter and it ended up being one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. Here’s why.
Besides the obvious (bonding with my baby) I got a chance to step away from a job that I had been at for the past 15 years. A job that I didn’t like. A job where I was undervalued, under paid, and under appreciated. Yet I kept going back to it.
But why? Why stay in a relationship that doesn’t work for me anymore?
Honestly, because I didn't believe that I was worth more than that job. I didn’t believe that I could make more money. I didn’t believe that I was worthy of a job that would put a smile on my face. And by staying I was accepting the job that I thought I deserved.
Back to my time off with my daughter.
Throughout the month my wife and I kept watching the Disney movie Moana. Not sure why but whenever our daughter slept, and if we weren’t sleeping too, that movie was on. Don’t worry this isn’t a spoiler alert. Just know that Moana lives on an island and she’s been told since birth that the Island is all that she needs and you don’t go anywhere beyond the reef surrounding it.
Yet Moana believed deep down that there was more beyond what she was being told. She believed that there was “more beyond the reef”.
Each time we watched the movie I kept hearing the same message “there’s more beyond the reef” which got me thinking… maybe there’s more beyond my job.
Over and over again I heard the same message and slowly, little by little, my mantra for the month became there’s more beyond my job. Which of course really meant I’m worth more than my job.
So I decided to quit. I talked to my wife and she was beyond supportive. She said she had been waiting for me to quit for a very long time. That’s how miserable I was there.
I formulated an exit strategy that consisted of the day I was going to leave and the day I was going to call my boss and tell him. That much was easy. The hard part was picking up the phone and calling him.
I remember sitting in my room getting ready to call my boss and being a nervous wreck. My thoughts were telling me that I was crazy for leaving. Telling me that I didn’t deserve any better and that I couldn’t do better. Yet I kept moving forward and courageously picked up the phone and I called my him. Trust me when I tell you, my entire body was shaking.
Three rings in and my heart was practically pounding out of my chest. The part of me that’s afraid of how the other person is going to react desperately wanted his answering machine to pick up but of course that but that didn’t happen. He picked up and after a minute or two of small talk I mustered up the courage to tell him.
I’m getting emotional right now as I write this because it wasn’t just the job that I was leaving, it was the belief that I’m not good enough for something better. That’s the painful destructive relationship that I was really stuck in. Not my job. My belief. And by taking contrary action I was saying goodbye to it. I was saying I am worthy and I deserve everything that my heart desires.
When I got off the phone I walked into the living room where my wife was and I started crying. I cried from a place deep within that was letting go of something that was a major part of my life that no longer served me.
With my wife’s loving arms wrapped around me and tears running down my face I looked out our front window just in time to see a truck pull up with the word ‘Salvation’ written on it. The universe obviously wanted me to see that.
The beliefs we carry within us determine the choices we make in our lives. Change your beliefs, change your life.
Have a beautiful day!
Zachary