The other day was my birthday and it was amazing. My wife spoiled me (even though I didn’t need to be spoiled) and I got to spend it with my daughter which made it truly special for me. But it’s the day after my birthday that I want to talk to you about.
As you might already know I’m not a big social media guy. In fact I’m only on Facebook 2 or 3 times a year. I believe this story is a perfect example as to why.
When I got up the morning after my birthday one of my first thoughts was I wonder what kind of birthday love I got on Facebook yesterday? Completely ignoring my heart (which is my true authentic self) I grabbed my phone and logged on.
Within seconds I found myself in a place of lack. There were birthday wishes written on my wall but not nearly the amount that I used to receive when I was an active Facebook user. I found myself wondering why people that I hadn’t talked to in years didn’t wish me a happy birthday.
And here’s the kicker. I intuitively knew ahead of time that this was what I was going to find yet I went on there anyway. In that moment I was using Facebook as a negativity drug.
As I sat there feeling ‘less than’ I realized I could do one of two things. I could go deeper down the rabbit hole of lack and make a complete mess of my day or I could acknowledge my pain and be okay with it. I’m happy to report that I chose the latter.
Yes my Facebook experience made me sad and… I’m okay with that. That’s huge growth for me. My old self would’ve jumped online and looked for a woman to validate me or played video games so I didn’t have to feel my uncomfortable feelings.
The point is stuff comes up for us and it’s what we do in these moments that’s important. I use to trick myself into believing that I couldn’t handle the pain that I felt from something and by doing that I didn’t allow myself the gift of being me. When we are truly okay with something we can process through it and allow it to leave us.
Once I allowed my disappointment to leave I remembered that I am the love that I was chasing. Me. Just as you are the love that you might be chasing. When we can remember this the world becomes a much better place.
Lots of love,
Zachary, the Conscious Father