The last nine years of my life have been incredible, exhausting, and completely exhilarating.
On October 20th, 2010 I hit what I call my rock bottom. I was broken, scared(of everything), and alone. And I hated being alone.
Courage to be seen
I’ve done a lot of writing centered around my childhood trauma, specifically around the terrible things that my father did to me when I was a little boy. As I continue to break away from my old story, and really remember who I am, I want to share with you a wonderful gift that my father and I gave each other along the way.
That no longer works for me
Fear of Disappointment
I haven’t been making time to write and it’s been weighing heavily on me. Like a lot.
Specifically, it’s been more than three months since my last newsletter. Oh sure I’ve had a lot going on but in my mind three months is too long and with each passing week my thoughts have gotten more convincing… you’re disappointed with me.
There is value in vulnerability
What are you projecting?
The other day I found broken taillight glass next to my wife’s car. At first I thought nothing of it but upon closer inspection I noticed that the person that parks next to my wife sideswiped her car while backing out of their spot. I looked for a note on our windshield admitting fault but there was nothing there. I was pissed.
The Past Makes You Rich
Then vs. Now
Speaking Your Needs
Raising a Healthier Future
My father was hurt by his parents' poor parenting and then he turned around and continued the cycle by hurting me. As a new dad, I have the opportunity to either unintentionally continue a family lineage of pain, or to stop the cycle.
Love,
Zachary, The Conscious Father
Negativity drug
Evolving at The Dolby Theatre
What’s a trait that you don’t like about yourself? When we are open and vulnerable about it we can evolve into who we are meant to be.
Love,
Zachary
Judge Everyone. Forgive Nothing. Forget Who You Are.
The vision statement for my spiritual center is Love Only, Forgive Everything, Remember Who You Are. To me this implies that if I bring love into all areas of my life and forgive all resentments, I won't lose site of who I am.
But what happens if you do the exact opposite of Love Only, Forgive Everything, Remember Who You Are? If you judge everyone and forgive nothing you forget who you are. I know because I’ve done this.
Unconscious Fears
Why I No Longer Believe There's Something Wrong with Me
My Expansion this Mother's Day
Change your belief, change your life
When a "like" is never enough
Complaint Addiction
The gift of our emotions
I spent years running from my emotions. I attempted to avoid them with television, video games, and social media (plus many other things) never realizing just how much damage I was actually doing to myself. I was cutting myself off from my feelings to the point where I couldn’t recognize them anymore.